My Hacks to Chill and Keep Grounded

My Hacks to Chill and Keep Grounded

Aug 11, 2020

hi. 

It has been so overwhelming for the past two months. I don't know why but it just so. Just last Thursday I got this mini anxiety (is that even legit?) because I have to cook early in the morning for the staff so that I can finish my bread and eggs that were expiring, had to manage a dinner plan for 12 that needed 40 minutes to drive while still needed to travel another four hours to Penang the next day for a three days trip. 

The timeline was all mixed up but I remember that I went for a day trip to Pangkor on Sunday and got back at almost midnight only to work tomorrow. Then to make thing more interesting, the whole week was packed with dinner plans, a 2pm to 10pm shift, buying a present and saying goodbye to our friend that got a job at Sabah. It was exhausting and I still went back to my hometown as I got an appointment at Hannan Medispa.

Then there is also this one week where I feel so shitty and depress which is most probably due to my menses is nearing and to top it off, I also got the weekend's shift. This was the same week where a friend of mine was being obnoxiously stupid and it was just so annoying and maddening. I had to give him a silent treatment just to chill and show that YOU CAN'T DO THAT TO ME. 

Ok, maybe I'm still a bit bitter.

via GIPHY

There was a blur of more dinner plans, planning for Penang trip, settling some works stuff, simply taking care of myself, my life's routine of questioning what I am doing with my life and I only seem to get a good sleep while at hometown. Amidst all those confusion I started to get acne due to mask-wearing and my hair is thinning and falling so bad. I don't have the luxury to care for my food intake and now I gain like 4kg like WHERE DID YOU COME FROM??

Anyway, it was a miracle that I'm still sane. The only way that I still survive those and not losing my mind is by doing these small things that keep me grounded and just be at ease. Keeping grounded is important for me because it feels like I'm going to lose myself if I just let the day pass without checking in with myself. It feels like I just float and got lost in the sky. Anyway, these weren't really THE tips for a wholesome and happy life but it helps me to cope when things feel too overwhelming.

Less social media time

I realized that I keep being on my phone to keep my mind off things but it just makes me feel even worse. I don't know how to scientifically explained it but it just is. So by being on my phone, especially social media, less, will help me feel a bit clear-headed. But not being on the phone just make me anxious. I need to be doing something but sometimes I'm just too tired to do anything productive or things that need me to focus like reading or writing. 

It wasn't totally foolproof but I have these little tricks I play on myself to get me off my phone. It didn't last long but it still helps. I consciously make rules that I need to obey before I can get on my phone. For example, I'm going to eat my food in silence and just savor it before checking my phone or I'm not going to check my phone and just enjoy the company I'm having at the moment or I let my battery drained and let it charge to full first because it will ensure my battery health. Sometimes I make a list of simple things I can do back to back and it helps me feeling accomplish so then I don't feel bad for being on my phone. If I really don't have anything to do, I make sure I watched something on Netflix instead of scrolling social media.

Good sleep

Good sleep is important. But I usually managed to sleep earlier easily and better at my hometown. I usually got nothing better to do by 10pm on weekdays but I can't bring myself to sleep early as I have always had this internal clock that I sleep at 12am. Usually, it wasn't really a problem to sleep at 12am because I always get a good sleep so I feel well-rested the next morning. But nowadays, I don't feel that way anymore.

I also just realized that my current lifestyle is taking a toll on my mental health so I really needed that good sleep. It helps me to start my day right and getting enough rest just puts the stress away. Now I'm trying to sleep earlier and set a new internal clock. It might take months to adjust but I think it is my next step in life or else I'll keep on feeling tired all day long. Not to mention that now I must have a decent breakfast instead of just coffee because I'll get all moody and sad waiting for lunch but lunch doesn't satisfy me much. I really did get to a stage in life where poor sleep and diet just ruin my day.

via GIPHY

Reading and Writing Poetry

Reading has been a great solace for me. I was so happy to learn about knowing Haruki Murakami's works. Reading his books, however confusing the storyline is, it always put me at ease. It was either the way he explains things or simply how he walks the characters, make me feel calm in following it. 

Writing poetry, on the other hand, is a good way for me to play with my creative side. It gives me a sense of hands-on activity that put me away from the mundane way of life. Though it is arguable to say that I'm a creative person. Sometimes I like to venture on a topic that has occupied my mind and just can't seem to fall through. By writing it, it gives me some sense of control and a whole lot of better understanding. Sometimes it helps me to let go. When some particular issues crowded my mind so hard, I try to make myself write a poem out of it and it calms me.

Time off from peoples

I'm not one to talk much if you're not my crowd even if we're going to work together, just the two of us, for the next 10 hours. I find it serenely resetting to spend my night shift with a person that I don't talk much and just not talking. You do you, I do me. We're going to be fine. Sometimes peoples are overwhelming to me. So I will consciously try to avoid being near peoples that I don't feel like vibing especially at work. There are a few times that I just spend my day with myself instead of going home. I don't know if it an ambivert thing or whatnot but I find myself needing that alone time especially after spending time with peoples. A day should be just fine and then I'm good.

Cleaning

I'm not really the tidiest person but I can't stand mess except when I'm tired. Which I always do now. But doing small things to clean stuff and put order into things really calms me. It also put me into a good mood though I take forever to do it. There is this weekend where I purposely spent my morning cleaning around the house because the week ha been too much for me and it works. I knew that cleaning makes me feel good but I thoughts it was because I finally put things where it should be but it turns out the act of cleaning itself helps me to feel better. So now sometimes, I tried to clean a bit in the morning of things that I left the night before because I was so tired and it helps me to feel better to go to work.

That's it! Omg, this is long and it took a whole week to write. 

Three Times I Overthink Music (or that time when i hate k-pop)

Three Times I Overthink Music (or that time when i hate k-pop)

Jun 23, 2019

You know that article where they go into vivid details into life-related topics but it is like so mundane and you got confused at why they need to be this particular for, this is one of it.

First and foremost, I'm an Army.

I like telling peoples that. Did you now have a second thought about me?

I can say I'm into K-pop instead but saying I'm an Army, particularly in Malaysia, will always give out this spite and god I live for that. I live for that time when you thought I'm one thing but no, I'm so much more. Peoples are so much more. Who knows I can be this petty?

Anyway. I wasn't always an Army. I used to have a phase when every song I played is only from Bastille. I still have the biggest love for Maroon 5 and Adele is a world's treasure. As you can see here, my music taste is heavily from the western side. Minus my high school time when I watch anime avidly and remembers the OST so well or that time when I always watch Music Bank. Do you know KHS? That was a thing too.

source

So now I want to share some stuff that music has made me think deeply (maybe a little bit too deeply) and this is like so weird but seems like a fun thing to write. Plus, my new niche is all about embracing life. In all way possible.

Apparently, stereotyping a skin color/nationality/race also applies to music and I am one of them

K-pop has influenced me for the longest time. I was there when MTV first aired Big Bang and it was a big hit that then they suddenly have a show for k-pop songs. Imagine how weirded out I was. I always put MTV on (internet wasn't an option for me then) and suddenly some Korean dudes with the most intense music video are on my tv (it was Haru Haru, still my favorite until today). 

But the craze was shortlived because apparently, not all k-pop group was like Big Bang, Super Junior or Girl Generations. At one point it seems repetitive but peoples are still going nuts over it. It is only in 2017 that I started to love BTS and started to listen to k-pop again. I realized the years has been good for them. They now have so much to offer and it's sad that most peoples don't realize that simply because they are some soft Korean dudes and their fans are stupid teenagers.

First of all, teenagers nowadays are so brilliant.

Secondly, I was one of them too. I never thought of them as softies or gay whatsoever but just that k-pop is a teenager thing to do. I lived my entire life (or at least until two years back) thinking that western peoples are the best version and it turns out that US has some serious problems that Trump is now a president and Europes with Brexit and racism and begging for money so that they can continue their trip across Asia because it is a life changing experience to do. Not until now, that I let the benefit of the doubt seeps in that I understand how tough the industry is and how avid the fans are. Not until I got to a point to think that it must be for a reason, like how everything is. Like how peoples become mad with football. BUT, even if it is unreasonable, I must respect that.

Well, not understanding a thing in Korean might also be an issue here but I have started singing anime OST since high school so that is really not an issue. But to degrade others liking something because" it was stupid, you don't even understand them" is not cool. Not cool at all. Music transcends boundaries guys. Life 101. Don't you know that?

I never hated Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus or that time when I want to stop hating Taylor Swift's song but ended up hating it even more 

I never hated Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus. That Wrecking Ball is good and music videos are always so weird so it wasn't anything strange to me. But if you know me, you would know that I hate Taylor Swift's songs.

Hate is such a strong word.

Okay, maybe I'm just a little bit annoyed. I love "Love Story" though. Anyway. It's nothing personal. It is just her songs is not my type and it gets a little overwhelmingly annoying because it will always be played on the radio. She is so famous. But weirdly enough, why must I hated all her songs? Was it because of all her failed love affairs and the songs that come with it? Everyone does that though. Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus aren't the best of humans too.

But why? Taylor Swift's songs were catchy, her voice is incredible, she is so versatile and she is a great philanthropist too. But I don't like her songs at all.

On the other hand, sometime earlier this year, I somehow just can't do any sweet love songs. The kind that is too cutely falling in love. After a few months, I realized that I never feel anything like that. I  still like my old cutesy falling in love songs. For me, as long as the lyric is beautifully done, regardless of the topic, I'm good to go. Slowly, I started to accept love songs back. It was so weird.

I realized I can't do one thing and then realized I have never been that way and somehow I got back to my old self again.

What that has taught me is that I can sometimes act way differently and just not realizing it. That changes can really creep up on me even on something that I have made myself clear that "I stand on this solidly". What I did after having such a realization? I decided to challenge my own stereotype.

I then decided to not hate Taylor Swift's song (yup, I really did that). Maybe I keep on hating her songs just because it is her songs. I decided that I need to challenge my own stereotype so I put on her tops hits together with Musixmatch, ready to sing my heart out.

I started with Blank Space cause that is my least hated music and I ended up actually hating it. Turns out her lyrics feels too childish for me and that is why I can't do Taylor Swift songs. Basically, it was my rule 101, if the lyrics are good, I'm good to go.

THAT IS WHAT I CALLED AS WHEEL OF EMOTION

Old people that say today's song is poorly made and their old songs are better is only such way because they can't accept changes

So there's this colleague of mine that I love to make fun of and he then makes fun of me liking BTS justifying his late 90's and early 2000's songs were better. I told him how could he be right when there are millions of Army out there. That got me thinking because I do have those favorite songs that aren't being made such way anymore and I finally am among those who say "there aren't any good songs anymore". My playlist is mainly of songs from a few years back and it was funny because I'm only 26!

Although there are oldies songs that I like (if Hey Jude and Hotel California are considered as such), the composition and even the lyrics are obviously not something that today's generation would wind up and be considered as a today song. They will always be referred back to that past generation. But peoples changes. Newer (mainstreams) songs cater to newer generations.

It is just inevitable. There aren't any superior generations with superior songs. Realizing this, I notice that I'm just not used to the new songs because it wasn't from my usual singers. I think I was not open enough to new things. Jonas Brothers have been reunited and Sucker was so good but it wasn't anything that the Disney's Jonas Brother would ever come up with but I still love Loves Bug and Burnin Up just the same.

I realized that I just rejecting new songs because it is new and not something I used too. It was just like when I need Writing on The Walls and Dangerous Woman to come out that I realized both Sam Smith and Ariana Grande has some powerful vocals. Although I can keep on living in the past with my old songs and simply says today's generation didn't know better cause I'm older, but where's the fun in that? I'm not letting go of the excitement of knowing new songs!

I kid you not, I really did be thinking this deep and then started to put newer songs into my playlist.

Are you as heavily opinionated on music like me? Or am I just overreacting?

Cooking for One (part 2) and Lunchbox Plan for One Week

Cooking for One (part 2) and Lunchbox Plan for One Week

Apr 10, 2019

I didn't go home this weekend so that I can focus on getting some posts done on my blog, thoroughly review my New Year's resolution and do whatever possible to get some of those resolutions working or at least makes a definite to-do things so that I do things. One of the things that I just have to get it done is this cooking post and also this lunchbox plan in order to eat healthier. Talk about being productive.

and by this weekend, I mean last weekend, because this post is scheduled to be posted sometime next week.

This "Cooking for One" is one post that I have put behind for almost two months. I knew that I'm going to need to move out so I make sure to not buy a lot and focus on finishing stuff that I already have. Yet there is still about five eggs and some cabbages that I have thrown away. There were plenty of goodbye feasts and night shifts as well so I just don't cook much.

Okay. First thing first, the groceries. Apparently, I forgot to take pictures of my groceries but it isn't that important so I'm just listing it here plus the things that I already have in the kitchen.

1. Broccoli 
2. Tomatoes - 4 medium sized ones
3. Kam Heong chili paste
4. Some eggs that just never finishes
5. Some dried noodles that took forever to finish
6. About 300g of meat

slow fry a tomato that has been cut into smaller pieces until it becomes some sort of paste and then put the meats and cabbages. season with salt and some kam heong chili paste. use the leftover paste on the pan to stir fry the noodles.

fry some onions and eggs (i always made the scrambled eggs into slightly bigger chunks). add some meat. season with oyster sauce, black pepper, and salt. I just melt some butter (i kept some for my bread) and fries the broccoli until it becomes soft. serve with noodle.

I have finally finished the noodles and the meat was still plenty so I decided to just cook all the meat left. this is actually a lazy recipe that we do at home. just cuts tomatoes into small bits, in this case, it is the last two medium sized tomatoes, and when it turns into a paste, adds meat. seasons with oyster sauce and salt. we always saute some onions first but I was lazy that day.

I think there were two more dishes but I can´t find the picture since I have changed to a new laptop. But it is more or less the same. The Kam Heong chili paste is amazing. If I have chickens or meats, I don´t have to add anything except for salts. It would taste great with rice but cooking rice for one person is too much work.

and now let´s move to my lunchbox plans 

I wanted to do a proper lunch box for works just for the fun of it and also to train myself not to gobble lots of rice with high-calorie gravy. For this first time, I wanted to do a sandwich/bread based dish. Why sandwich? Cause I don´t want to spent too much time to prepare the food.

So roughly, I´m thinking to buy some eggs (can also serve as side dishes), some salads and tomatoes, probably one cucumber (also can serves as side dish as well), chicken breast for my proteins, some mayonnaise or cheese or mustard sauce or something cause I don´t like chili sauce on my sandwich, a papaya (I´ll be eating papaya for the whole week lol) and of course bread. So maybe it can be something like -

• Monday - sandwich with slices of chicken breast (seasoned with black pepper and oyster sauce) with salad and tomatoes. Probablymayonnaisee or mustard sauce. 
• Tuesday - typical eggs with mayonaisse sandwich and cheese (for added proteins)
• Wednesday - repeats Monday recipe
• Thursday - typical roti telur but made into a sandwich with cucumbers
• Friday - sandwich with slices of chicken breasts and cheese.

The everyday sandwich will have papaya and cucumbers as side dishes. If I feel like the sandwich is too plain, I need to add cheese or chicken or eggs so that the extra protein can fill me up. I´m also going to keep some milk at work or else I´ll make another cup of coffee or simply wants buys some sugary drink. Milk helps me to put those urges at bay lol.

That´s all. Long live sandwich.

January To Do

January To Do

Jan 10, 2019

I'm playing Sims mobile because I want to like understand what playing Sims feels like but this mobile is like so basic so I guess it is not a good plan but I'm determined to have my sims married. 

Besides playing Sims, there are plenty of things I want to do this month. However, this post is scheduled to post today (10th January 2019) because traffic and stuff since I just posted my 2019's resolutions a few days ago (but I actually wrote both posts on the same days, talk about inceptions).

Firstly, I dropped that "Roll On" before my post's titles. I'm not actually sure how that started but it feels stupid for 2019 so yeah, goodbye.

Secondly, I've just updated my Pinterest board. I love it so, so much.

Now let's get on to it.

life on track

1. Two blog posts - list of poetry books I have and 2018 faves part two
2. Spring Cleaning my blog's labels
3. Do Hatyai's itinerary planning 
4. Update 10 poems discussion for Instagram
5. At least have 5 days with 5k steps
6. At least have 5 days with 10k steps
7. Choose two cause to donate monthly
8. Hang out leisurely with friends (done)
9. Read 30 pages of Midnight Monologues
10. At least have two weeks of tracking calories (not necessarily be calorie deficit)
11. Puasa for two days

That's it!

Roll On: Cooking For One For One Week With One Grocery Shopping

Roll On: Cooking For One For One Week With One Grocery Shopping

Dec 6, 2018

So, the title is either genius or simply frustratingly confusing.

In welcoming my after PRP life and the revival of Crack Culture - we are living healthier!

I love to cook. However, cooking for one is such a big hassle and it is just not the kind of hassle I need during PRP. Now that I have finished my PRP, we can put more effort into cooking.

Most importantly cooking and eating healthier.

So, my big problem with eating is that

1. I tend to eat more rice
2. I snack a lot. Like a lot, lot

Living stressfully have also been very conducive to make me eat more. 

Now, I'm not doing this to lose weight but I'm doing this because I want to re-program my eating pattern. What I'm doing is that I got this new project where I planned my grocery shopping to last for a few days (most ideally to last a week) and try to cook simple-no-rice meals. I'm doing only lunches at the moment because I'm afraid I'll get bored easily and then turn back to eat like I used too. 

It has happened before guys so we are taking this slowly.

Before we start to talk about what to cook - we have to get the technicalities prepared first. You will at least need a (1) stove (if you don't have one, maybe try to invest on those portables ones). A (2) non-stick pan, medium sized is more than good. Since we are cooking for one, you don't really need ladle and stuff. Spoons will work (I only use spoon since the portion is small). A (3) knife (a medium-sized and sturdy knife, not that cute thin ones). (4) Chopping board is also important. I know some might get that thrifty idea to just cut stuff on a table but please get one. A small one is good enough.

i'm having such a big problem at how seokjin loves to cook and looks so comfortable in the kitchen.
this screams relationship material for god sake!

Now, let's talk groceries!

Firstly I bought two pieces of chickens breast. If you know groceries, you know how a chicken is sold according to parts. I chose chicken breast since it has the least fat plus easier to work with. Keeping a tray of eggs is good too. Actually, I should have bought one piece of chicken breast and a medium sized mackerel tuna. I got bored rather quickly with the chicken breast and mackerel tuna is the only fish I like to eat not fresh. 

I have a weird palate. 

I can't eat a not-freshly caught fish. 

I swear I'm not being picky.

I'm just programmed this way.

Actually, if we got more choices here, I would just buy tuna blocks. It's much more fulfilling and can be cooked easily but still tasted good. Plus, if I actually got the time to go to the wet market, I would have bought squids too.

Now come the fun part, vegetables! Since I'm not eating rice, vegetables are needed to make me feel full. The trick is to have different kinds of vegetables. At least one leafy ones  (the lettuce) and one crunchy one (the capsicum). For this time, I also got myself mushrooms and tomatoes. It is a good choice due to the structure and thus the variability of taste which is important so that I'll not get bored easily. The sweet potato is also important because I still need some sort of carbohydrate and plus, it tasted good too! But these are actually more than I need for a week. The broccoli and half of the capsicum gone bad actually. I also bought a small loaf of Gardenia's wholemeal bread.

Now comes the important part - getting that good flavor. First of all, you have to buy onions. At least buy a few cloves of garlic and a handful of onions. Next are those fellas in the pictures above. I know I'll need to at least stir-fry the vegetables and maybe grill the chicken. These four ingredients (plum sauce, oyster sauce, roughly grinded black peppers and dried rosemary leaves) are good enough to marinate your chicken and to be made into a simple sauce. Saute some onions and put oyster sauce is good enough to stir-fry vegetables. These will last you more than a month actually.

So what did i cook?

I don't want to spend a lot of time cooking so it must be simple menus but at the same time, it needs to have good flavors and some sort of variety. Mind you, I have a very simple palate, so if you guys need stronger flavors, I can suggest some things but it may or may not meet your satisfaction. Plus, the use of more colors (different vegetables) will work wonder to make foods look more appetizing.

1. Fried noodles

Onions, chicken, mushrooms and some oyster sauce. I put oyster sauce instead because I don't one to use the instant noodles seasoning. This is an experiment of some sort. So the vegetables and chicken gives out flavor to the noodle too. I don't want to use the seasoning because I want to buy the instant noodles only, not the ones with seasoning and stuff. this way I can choose healthier noodles. But if this is too bland for you, try adding some chili paste and some soy sauce. You can try buying actual noodle but this is once a week plan so dried noodles is my best choice. there are plenty of choice, just looks for the ones with lesser calories

2. A simple stir-fry

Just stir fry some vegetables and to make it more fulfilling - add some carbs and proteins. I used scrambled eggs but eggs tasted so bland, I should use chicken instead. I put some crouton-ish into this too. I simply did some oil-less fry of one slice of wholemeal bread and cuts it into smaller pieces. You can try to put potatoes instead but I decided it was too much work. For the flavoring, I put oyster sauce and black pepper. This is a very simple dish so I'm not quite sure what you can do more to make it more appetizing.

3. Proteins and funs with vegetables

I also did a mix of things and plate it this way. Since the ikan tongkol is fried and thus is flavorful enough, I just toss some freash lettuce and cherry tomatoes. The sweet potato slices were fried with no oil. I thought I cut the sweet potatoes too thin but these end up being so filling.

The chicken was supposed to be made into a sandwich since I keep some of my grilled chicken for that purpose but I didn't feel like eating a sandwich and made this instead. Then green leaves are actually spinach. A friend of mine gave it to me. I did a quick fry of the spinach and the tomatoes with plum sauce. Totally loving it.

Kinda a grilled chicken but I did on my nonstick pan. I just turn it into slow heat and put the lid on. I marinated it overnight first with some black pepper, dried thyme, oyster sauce, and plum sauce. I also put some onions which are actually optional. I just wanted more taste with the use of onions. When I finished cooking the chicken, I use the same pan and fry the mushrooms and sweet potatoes. I add some more oyster sauce and plum sauce so that I have a bit of sauce to go with the chicken.

4. Sandwich

wholemeal bread just give better taste profile and I did way too much filling~

I fry the ingredient a bit while cooking the chicken (I didn't make the grilled chicken yet) because I don't feel like wanting to eat everything so fresh. 

I still cook but I didn't actually go for one-week grocery shopping since I currently keep on taking few days off from work. I have lots of time off to be used so I didn't need to buy much groceries to cook for one week. I still cook though. If I got enough menus, I'll write another post. And probably takes a good landscape sized photo instead.

Roll On: What Did I Do In One Year After Graduating

Roll On: What Did I Do In One Year After Graduating

Sep 6, 2017

It's actually about a month or two more but for the sake of generalisation and simple title, we'll stick with one year.

This takes forever to finish because believe it or not, I'm busy. I started writing before Independence Day and well, we'll see when will it finally been published.

eheh. sorry not sorry.
source

I'll tell you guys properly later (as in God knows when later truly means) on why I am not a pharmacist yet. Please just believe me that I'm not doing this for fun. But for now, I'm gonna share what I did in all these time.

Let's do this then.

#1 I worked as a substitute teacher for 2 months

About a month after finishing my study, a friend of mine told me about a substitute teacher opening. It is not under Jabatan Pendidikan Negeri (JPN) but was under Persatuan Ibu Bapa dan Guru (PIBG) instead. Apparently, even with the shortage of teachers, JPN just not hiring more substitute teachers. To cope with it, the PIBG gave some money for the school to hire independently. The salary is small (the teachers called it compensation instead of salary). I taught History to Form One student and Bahasa Malaysia to Form Two students. It was a really good expose for me befriending the teachers and the kids. I was really enjoying teaching too. However, it was quite a big challenge for me in being patient and coping with the more badly behaved kids. All and all, I'll do it all over again if I was given another chance at it.

source

#2 Blogging my heart out

I was always a blogger and apart from the time constraint, the Malaysian blogging community was another reason why I didn't blog more seriously. You see, during my studies, I still do a little bit blogging but I didn't get involved with any other bloggers. It was hard blogging in English guys. More importantly, I regard writing as a beautiful skill and looks up to those who can write properly. It is quite hard to find these kinds of quality hence I didn't have many blogs that I truly enjoy and genuinely want to know more about the blogger behind it. All factors in, I wasn't a more avid blogger then than I am now. As I start to blog this time, I was so surprised to finally knowing lots of local quality blogs that I truly enjoyed (like the one in my blog list). The blogging community is just so precious for me right now. I hope I can write forever!

#3 Reading *coughs*

Some of the quality blogs that I have grown to like have this Goodreads yearly challenge. It was a wild thing for me. I never met anyone so passionate and is so objective-minded in their reading. I do read, but not so much. This is also the time when I start to learn about book bloggers too. It gets me pumped up and I quickly make my own challenge. I only vouched for 25 books and now I am on my 11th book (kill me). My progress was so slow because I want to read books that widen my views though my true favourite genre is fiction (English preferably). I also read three poetry books and oh my god, you guys don't have any idea how emotionally exhausted I am reading those. I hardly get more than five pages per sitting. 

The Uswatun Hasanah and Gifts of The Heart book were in my possession for years before I finally read it.

#4 Writing poems

On May the 22nd, I decided to use my Instagram account as a poetry account since I don't really post any pictures anyway. At the moment, I just post whenever I get an idea and it was quite childish in a way. The presentation is awful too. I was learning to understand the poetry community in Instagram which turns out to be more exciting than the one in Wordpress. It is easier too since everything is there. I started to join writing prompts and by 16th August I decided that my Instagram account gonna be an official poetry account. I do all things that I want to have in an official poetry account - a proper business profile account (that's why I need to make a facebook page lolz), a proper Instagram account name (@afifahwrites), a symbolic DP (black wings), becoming more interactive, proudly identifying myself as a poet and most importantly - to get more involved with the poetry community. This short experience has taught me lots of poetry writing and I actually set some goals for September. I even do cool feeds etc guys. This is my golden trophy. You guys can scroll down to be linked to my poetry account. By the way, this stuff took a lot of time.

@afifahwrites

#5 Housechores and other stuff

Since my mom passed away, I take the responsibility to cook whenever I'm home. Cooking is such a fun thing for me and to be able to cook a satisfying meal just makes everything worth it. If I feel like it, I even make some dessert guys. Sometimes I didn't let my other sisters cooked because I want it to be done my way. Apart from cooking, there are the regular laundry work and cleaning the house work and so on. I have plenty to do daily even without writing poems or updating my blog. The other stuff is those things that we have to do every once in while like going to our kampung to collect sawit money (my dad grew palm oils), heading everywhere since Muslim studies in Jitra, Natrah with her Ipoh's dental appointment and we usually visits our relatives in Puchong, paying bills and car loans (which took an honest the whole morning to have it settled) and cooking small feast for the weekly  surau's after Yasin feast. Since these are physical and I have the worst stamina ever I might let myself lazying around after finishing the works. Yay unemployment!

He is literally a ball of sunshine
source x Hiatus x (Pinterest)

#6 Movies and TV shows

Mostly movies as I quickly get bored with tv shows. Although currently, I am rather swooning over Tom Hiddleston in The Night Manager and also am eagerly waiting for the second season of Stranger Things. I tried to watch some new TV shows but all bore me like Elementary, Lucifer, Riverdale and 13 Reasons Why. I am a movie kinda girl. I've been meaning to list all the movies I have watched but that's gonna take quite some time to actually remembers it all. Recently, I just finished rewatching Lord of The Ring trilogies as I didn't follow the plot closely when I watched it during high school. You know how these movies take ages - I roughly spend 12 hours to finish it. I am going to finally watch the third movies in The Hobbits trilogies. I was so sakit hati with the second one because it titled The Desolation of Smaug but Smaug screen time was at the end of the movie only and it was only for about 15 minutes. Arghhhhh. 

I might have a new craze
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#7 Tutoring jobs

I've been doing tutoring jobs for some time but it was just part time. About three months ago I started to teach two kids - one is having her UPSR and another one is having his SPM this year. About two months ago I started to teach another kid for his PT3. You could say their moms are resorting to personal tutoring as their last resort for their kids to face exams. I was introduced by my friends who was teaching the kids mathematics. Oh, I forgot to tell that I am teaching English. It was quite hard for me since their grip in English is quite low than what I was during high school. That is why I was hired anyway. I have to spend some time to brush up my Grammar and preparing materials to teach them. It was hard to instil that English is easy but they have to read more and write more. Well, they are kids right. I hope I can at least get the basics right so that they can see how wonderful writing and English language is. #prayforcikguafifah #prayforthekidstogetAinEnglishtoo

I guess that was all. I actually wrote in my notebook on the points  I want to write but the book is downstairs and I am upstairs. I just gonna accept it wholeheartedly if I missed any point.

omg, I FINALLY FINISHES THIS.

Roll On: Good Practice To Do When You Meet a Doctor (Malaysia)

Roll On: Good Practice To Do When You Meet a Doctor (Malaysia)

Aug 23, 2017

This is supposed to be What Malaysians Should Do When They Got Sick (Part Two) however, I managed to do a specific theme on this so I just rename it to Good Practice To Do When You Meet a Doctor (Malaysia). You see, the contents of my first post seemed a bit all over the place. I have a lot of things to tell but I don't really have a good way to make it seems more structured. It was like I'm just pouring out words after words. However, this time I got it structured better hence the title.

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Roll On: What Malaysian Should Do When The Got Sick (Part One)

Roll On: What Malaysian Should Do When The Got Sick (Part One)

Aug 10, 2017

More writings on pharmacy! Yay!!

Ok, yada yada, I'm a graduate of Pharmacy in UKM, yada yada, let's talk health.

These are few notes for you guys to practice when you got sick later and I only put the word "Malaysian" since I wrote this based on my limited experience with Malaysian compared to what I have learned in UKM. Apart from that, it is also because there are few things that I think Malaysian may not know that they need to take extra attention. My writing is just so long because I love you guys and I really really want to share these important things. So I have to do this in parts.

Oh my gawd that is so confusing. I don't have any good idea for opening so let's just gets to it.

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Roll On: Malaysian Reading Behaviours

Roll On: Malaysian Reading Behaviours

Aug 9, 2017

I have done few types of polls during my curatorship for @twt_buku

I know, that curator thing had passed like a million years ago but I have put this as list-of-topics-i-will-blog-about so I just have to still do this. I hope you guys can benefit from this. These are merely my curiosity.

You see, I'm not really a reader and the first time that the idea of reading lots of books come to my knowledge is when we were in high school. Everyone reads those cheesy love novels by Alaf 21 and for me, that's no reading. Upon entering university I learned that there are actually plenty of books to be read and even though it is exciting I learned another new thing also - I don't really enjoy all books. Yet, even so-called "universities student" we didn't really spend much time reading. We watched lots of movies though.

Books are wonderful. A lot of exciting new things and adventure. An escape. An answer. A whole new world. From there on I try to keep challenging myself to read or at least find more books that I think I will like. Wattpad and fan fiction has been wonders as well.

Excuse me, sir, what you're doing with your lips is so unnecessary.
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Roll On: Types of Feeeeeeeeeeeeeeelings (for writers out there)

Roll On: Types of Feeeeeeeeeeeeeeelings (for writers out there)

Aug 7, 2017

The other day I read this post and thought that I feel cringy but it really isn't about cringy. It's like part annoying but I was really annoyed. The point is I can't find words to describe what I feel. Then I remembered that the other day (before that day, of course, stay with me) I wanted to learn words to describes different kind of feelings and moods. 

I'm also thinking to have a discussion with this Year 6 students that I am tutoring about different kind of feelings. It will help for her to write more since she needs to write based on pictures. I trained her by questioning things in the picture and one of it includes to identify the facial expression and understanding what the person in the picture is feeling.

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Roll On: Amalina 17A1 Shares Her Study Tips @twt_malaysia

Roll On: Amalina 17A1 Shares Her Study Tips @twt_malaysia

Aug 4, 2017

I can't remember when but did you guys get that hype about Amalina wearing tights in skin colour and it looked as if she didn't wear any pants? That got me get back in touch with Amalina and regardless of her choice of attire - she didn't deserve such a negative backlash from Malaysians. Anyway, guess what, this amazing girl is now pursuing her training to become a surgeon in London. Not only that she is going to train to become a breast oncoplastic consultant surgeon. Idolaaaaaaaaaa.

Introducing Charlie - my idolaaaa in Supernatural.
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Roll On: The Route of MRT and LRT (Malaysia)

Roll On: The Route of MRT and LRT (Malaysia)

Jul 31, 2017

This is merely me, sharing my own personal research since I got so confused about these two and because I use it - sometimes.

LRT stands for light rail transit. On the other hand,  MRT stands for mass rapid transit. The thing that got me so confused is their route. Apparently, I got confused due to LRT extension work and the newly developed MRT. I thought that the new stations for LRT were the MRT. There are totally different!

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As I have alway know, LRT consist of Ampang Line and Kelana Jaya Line and have just finished extending their route last year. The old route for Kelana Jaya Line means from Gombak Station until Kelana Jaya Station while the old route for Ampang Line means from Ampang Station and breaks and Chan Sow Lin station where one of it go to Sentul Timur Station and the other one go to Sri Petaling Station. The best thing is after the extension work finished, both Ampang Line and Kelana Jaya Line is connected via Putra Heights Station. 

On the contrary, MRT is a new route made from Sungai Buloh station until Kajang Station. Both works for developing MRT and extending LRT was done in the same time so pardon my befuddled judgement.

In conclusion, I just wanna say it is easy for me to hang out at Kuala Lumpur if I go and visit my relatives in Puchong due to the *extended* LRT route. MRT route won't be much needed for me. Lulz.

http://www.midvalley.com.my/locate/by-train/

Funnily, as I always find this image to help me plan my journey - I have never found the one who says "Yes, MRT line is now good to go". Until last two weeks when I actually saw Sungai Buloh Station up and running and just literally at awe. I was having some hard time locating this picture too!

Pro tips - go to myrapid.com and choose "Plan Your Journey" so that you know which train to take and most importantly how much it gonna cost you. 

More pro tips - if you rarely went there but you didn't want the hassle of queuing and buying tokens, just use your MyKad as Touch N Go. It is easier since Touch N Go can also be used on KTM and if I'm not mistaken - it is cheaper by 10 or 20 cents than using tokens.

By the way, I just realized it too that LRT and MRT was a project of Ministry of Finance - they were owned by the Malaysian government. Of course, it is lah kannnn. It's the freaking public transport. 

Roll On : My Unexpected Rendang Recipe

Roll On : My Unexpected Rendang Recipe

May 25, 2017

Lazada is holding this competition for bloggers and heck yeah I am joining it since I missed it the last time. I didn't put much hope to actually win anything but it felt good to be part of this. The requirement for this week (19 May 2017 – 1 June 2017) theme is to share my favourite recipe. For that folks, I have a little story for you.

Yesterday, there is some sambal left and Walid bought ikan gerut gerut (silver grunter). I always loved the succulent meat paired with savoury gravy. Coincidentally, there are also some lemongrasses left for that steamed fish recipe so I pureed that with some onions, simmers it and put the sambal. Long story short, I was utterly shocked that it tasted like rendang. After I re-checked it - it was actually rendang that I just cooked!

Apparently, even with almost 10 years cooking experience, I still didn't know the recipe for rendang! I never even thought about it since I only saw my aunt cooked it for aidilfitri and it looked so complicated (lots of ingredients) and took too long to cook (probably because we cooked a lot and my aunt loved it dry). The sambal itself has been mixed with some coconut milk to make it creamier and tone down the spicy-ness. I was not really a bright kid, aren't I?

Not helping Sam. Pfft.
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Roll On: Reading - An Alien to Malaysian or is it just me?

Roll On: Reading - An Alien to Malaysian or is it just me?

May 5, 2017

To be frank, I wasn't big on reading. For the bigger part of my past, the idea of reading itself is somewhat weird. Most of the people I knew don't read and those who reads was not religiously. Maybe this public figures just published a book or some film was made from it or someone you look up to suggest the book - usually, the uplifting your heart kind of book. The ones who read was more spurs of the moment kind of action instead of the needs to read a book.

The needs!

Roll On: Why Malaysian Get Fake "Medicine" and What To Do?

Roll On: Why Malaysian Get Fake "Medicine" and What To Do?

Apr 28, 2017

I'm trying to make a controversial title but the answer is really easy - it is because we ain't got enough knowledge. Where exactly to get that knowledge? How to get updated? Easy peasy lemon squeezy! Just do what I did - get a degree in Pharmacy.


I mean it.










For real.


















Ok, it's a joke.


I thought it would be good to write about pharmacy stuff - sort of getting in touch with my root. Stay tuned as I share a bit of my own insight on this issue, common fraud and how to be medicine savvy.

Websites That Suggest Movies

Websites That Suggest Movies

Apr 23, 2017

I am feeling so accomplished right now because I am writing this on Friday and it will be scheduled to be posted online on Sunday (which is today of course) because I'm busy for the weekend but I still wanna grab me some traffic during this weekend so there - a scheduled post!

I am so organised, woo hoo.

Before we go further, please help yourself and watch the Batman trilogies, Forrest Gump and the ever enchanting The Fight Club. If you have, AREN'T THOSE MOVIES GREAT!

Usually, when I want to watch something, I'll just Google top movies for the genre that I feel like watching. I'll just Google top action or top horror movies and I prefer to watch something that Rotten Tomatoes gave a high rating. To be honest, the list felt repetitive and I am quite picky which in turn made the list bores me so it got me thinking, there must be other ways to get movies suggestion.

Roll On: My Ways To Write Better

Roll On: My Ways To Write Better

Feb 24, 2017

24/02/2017

I may not be somewhat good in writing but you should see how much I have improved and that is the basis of this entry.

500 words constriction so let's go!

     Dean killed Hitler so all those grammar Nazis, beware.
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1. Make words constriction.

Actually, having words constriction is also a good way to improve your writing. It helps me to focus on important things and makes me try to explain in concise vocabulary.

2. Use of Grammarly

I've tried some apps to check my spellings and grammar errors and Grammarly has worked out so good. It's now my go-to since it allows online checking. Yeah, it checks while we write, it's magic.

I've shared about Grammarly in My Blogging Tricks

3. Use bold and italic option wisely.

When I write there are certain words I need to emphasise properly so that the readers gets the vibes that I want to deliver. I would use the bold and italic option for that - ie bold statement has to be bold lah kan. Use ctrl+i to italicise and ctrl+b to bold so that you can write faster.

4. Never mix with other languages.

I used to be hard on myself that strictly no Bahasa is allowed at all. It's actually not a good thing to mix. However, I still do it because it kinda feels more like me. But only a little bit like for example at #2 where I use the word lah kan because I liked how it is all in English and that there is this one word in Bahasa like, is this some cool words or anything?  However, NEVER does it until the reader become lost. I saw some blogger write one sentence in English and the next sentence in Bahasa like some sort of alternating games. Worse, alternating paragraph. 

5. Read more and some more.

Although I am writing in English, Bahasa books would also benefit me. I love noticing the writing style and how the writer explained a particular moment. Reading helps to understand how we can explain stuff and adds up vocabulary. It triggers you to think and at the same time inspire.

6. Blog more and some more.

Having a blog is also a meant for me to write better. Practice makes perfect, right? Publishing my works has given me some sense of accomplishment and kept me want to write more. Since I have lots on my mind, I write some variable topics and that has led me to learn many more new vocabulary and also challenge me to inquire new things. Not only that, I tend to read my posts for a few times and it allows me to assess what I have done wrong or which part I can do better.

7. Poems

Honestly speaking, trying to channel emotions into poetry has also help me write better. Poetry is like the beautiful scenery at sunset but in words. Now, I can't have everyone write poems now do I. Just read some. I know a blogger who recently published a free poetry ebook if you want to try. Or you can simply read the lyrics to the songs that you like. Or you can try read my poems. 

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