roll on : Afifah stressful effect.

Assalammualaikum!

Current mood. Stress like arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!

Haha!

Ok, i'm in the middle of exam week. Two paper left and i have this sudden urge to post something though i got tonnes thing to study. i can sometime be really weird. i called it the stressful effect.


aquaria KLCC. underground p/way.


Some thought to point out.


  1. i'm in that time of the month and the stressful exam make my pimples go crazy! this things have troubled me for quite a long time. i try lots of thing but my pimples wont actually become better and my face is full of scar. i got bad habit to pinch my pimples. and the never ending episodes of pimples growth just make it worst. i need to get serious on this. i have also try to see a doctor but...arrgghhhhhhh.. SERIOUS. SERIOUS. SERIOUS,
  2. since now i'm in my second year, i got a single room. it is fun to have your own space since i have been living with 6 siblings for my entire life. but it is quite lonely though. and my room was suddenly the one and isolated from the rest of my course-mates. speechless. not sure it is a good thing or bad thing. but Allah swt have decided everything the best way possible right? POSITIVE.
  3. got those depression kind of feeling every once and a while as if those time when i got into some serious shit during matriculations. i'm not sure it is trigger by what. just that, i hate that vulnerable feeling.
  4. why i always failed to prepare as i want before exams! i managed to do this in matriculation. hmm. need to improve my time management.
  5. i want to be more confidence. 
  6. i want to improve my life. currently i do feel my life lack of purpose and directions. it feel like i have lost something. need to do some deep analysis on my life and do suitable adjustment. need to be strict also on following the adjustment. it is not like i'm getting younger.
  7. i suppose to stop writing like 5 minutes ago and continue my study. but then, here i am. 
  8. i miss my mom.
  9. i miss my bestfriends.
  10. i miss my siblings.
  11. i need to get focus on my life and stop procnasting. also need to use my time on things that really benefits me. more productive!!
  12. start my study earlier. stop giving excuses that i need rest or i'm too busy. it is never no time to study. come on! i can do this!
  13. stop google things and start doing it!
  14. control your eating and exercise more. build your stamina!
  15. i want to on dean list! badly!!

more importantly, i want to make plans that will improve me as a muslim. like a real strategic plan that i know i can follow it daily. be istiqamah on it. the idea is that i try to improve myself daily. i want to be better than yesterday. 

you know something, when i finish designing those perfect plan, i will post it here. for now. my ibadah now is to study!

# I have just changed the melting picture at my sidebar. his name is Joseph Gordon Levitt. i love his cute/hot charismatic figure. i just realized that i got this soft side for guys who nailed suits. they're simply awesome. 

roll on : keep rolling

I never quite understand what does it means to love someone deeply. and sincerely. I don't know why. At first I thought it is just me being cold hearted. Although I know i'm quite a sensitive person but it seems that it may be two separate things.

But i do know how. I see it from my father who always make sure we get everything that we need. I see it from my mother who always so concern about my health. I see it from Angah who never let me down when i ask for help. I see it from Nabila love to hugs me and smile so happily when she saw me home.

Yet, i know and sure that i love them too. Nothing could make me feel less loving them except to love them even more.

Losing really teach you to be grateful and to live in the moment. to appreciate everything. even the smallest thing. cause you could never know when will you lose it forever and what left then to love maybe none. nothing. zero.

and losing have teached me love. i think i quite get the idea of it. the LOVE idea.

it is when you want them to be happy all the time.
it is when you want them to get everything that they want.
it is when you feel guilty when you know that something cannot be undone,
             and the one you love would never get the opportunity as you does.


when you lose something so precious. you will feel true love. and you start to realize that there is much more to it. let it go and do the best that we can.

Allah who love us the most never will leave you. So, why so serious?


fun moment. sad that the camera is rosak now. =.='


roll on : take your words seriously!

i'm not that good with peoples that annoys me. i can be patience and tolerate, but sometimes i just snap. that doesn't bother me much because when i really do that, it is because that thing have been bothering me on and on. i'm not that crazy to marah orang all suka suka hati. though i hope i can still improve this.

just that, i'm quite upset for the fact that i get annoyed easily. although for some people, it is a normal thing to simply accept, i just can't get it. one thing that really bothers me now when living in uni life is that, why people can't live up to their word?

in my atmosphere right now, it seems that your word cannot be trusted at all. a person can't claim for what a person say or show their agreement too. the most common thing is when i set up a time to meet, depending on what kind of deal you are going too, you can actually set allowance for late! amazing right? to think that you can actually predict it. although there are some exception with regard to who is coming also.

fact : if you know you need for allowance of time of 30 minutes (this is the real deal). you could never actually set it to be late for 30 minutes as it will still be 30 minutes late.



and the most awful thing is, i got to go with the flow. since everyone is doing that.