My last post was on the 4th of October. It's a good two months of me not writing anything. Not sure how I am feeling about that but yesterday, I do suddenly missing writing my poems. 

I thought I'm going to write about how life has been just to show how a person in her late twenties is doing. Writing a poem is not it by the way. I miss it so much though.

A lot has been happening and everything went so fast. Before I knew it, there's another two months left before my three months notice is finished. Yup, that happens. I went on for an interview, succeeded and in two months, I'll be working a new place. I got two fresh new staff that I need to train, again, and I hope they'll stay long enough or at least until the company got a new pharmacist to replace me. The new staffs are so much easier to work with so I'm immensely thankful for that.

I did my presentation for the company last month. It was my first time ever doing a presentation in this company and outside of the hospital setting. It occupies me for a good two weeks. I keep putting off doing the slides in favor of training new staff (the ones who have quit) and doing everything on my own since I can't rely much on the new staff. I even did the slides at home because I wanted to finish them before going on a short staycation-ish trip with my friend. It was only for a few hours though. I am very serious about not doing my work at home. 

I'm so proud of the slides. I purposely choose a title that I don't know much and with that, I was able to learn so many new things. The presentation went well too. All and all, it was a good success.

The staycation is a success too. We were celebrating a friend of ours who came back from Sabah. We stayed at Dorsett KL, play some electronic scooter, watch a good horror movie, frolicking in the rooftop pool for hours and end it with a nice hi-tea buffet at Atmosphere 360. 

She did drop us a bomb by suddenly saying she is going to get married without any notice about how there's a prospective guy in her life. Now that's something that I'm not sure if I was borderline mad or just annoyed about. I'm not really close with her as we rarely get the chance to see each other but there's a few of us back then so it was natural for us to get her into our group. I guess she was that introverted person which we adopt so I love being able to celebrate her. I can't help also feeling betrayed when she told us that like it was nothing. 

I feel like sharing this because it's one of the things that usually happen and sometimes it can be a confusing thing.

The problem is that when I get angry or anything, I tend to shut down from such people. At first, it was because I realized that I can be so cruel when I'm mad so I learned to just step away. Before long, stepping away becomes letting them go and I am simply at peace. It is surprisingly easy to let go. Like if I ever did this to you, I'm sorry but I can't give you any good explanation because I just can't be bothered so there's that. 

I need to improve my communication skills. Like a friend of mine has been so annoying lately and I'm like "We need to switch you off for a while" but the pharmacy he's working at is finally opening today so I need to wish him or something. I'm so proud of him though.

I've been spending more time with my family since the interstate travel ban has been lifted. They have finished re-did my old grandparent's house and I finally get to see it. It was so nice being able to stay in my village again. We even do a small get-together with my relatives there.

I didn't get updated with Covid-19 cases much these past months and my new housemate told me that we might go into another lockdown so that's a thought I'm going to put far behind my mind. Oh ya, I got two new housemates so no more putting stuff everywhere because I was the only one here. That was a sweet one month of privacy.

Besides those is the typical changing new tyres, getting a deal for a new brake pad, going for Dr Ko sessions and I even get the chance to try a new restaurant around here. I don't read though. I need to continue my reading lol. 

I think that is all and it has been good.

Also, I put those Veets cream above my upper lips area to get rid of those tiny hairs. I tried shaving but it didn't give me a smooth finish. Waxing causes small bumps afterward. Putting Veets makes it so smooth so yeah. Don't do it.

BMPIL Writing Challenge - All About Laundry

Oct 4, 2021

 What was I thinking when I put this topic in? 

With that thought on my mind, I am again reminded that these topics were meant to get me more in touch with my life. It is easy to get lost by doing everything as if life itself is merely a repetition of things. Day in day out. Although I love having such structure, the appeal becomes a dread as it is literally the only thing that I can do while in this "lockdown". 

I haven't been home for months and literally shuts out for weeks on end to simply living day in and day out. I realized I never actually addresses this. I stop thinking about how many days it has been and I don't even care what day it is. Thank god we can do inter-district travel. I got to meet my friends and it feels so good.

Anyway, I'm actually doing my laundry at the moment which is actually a coincidence. I work half-day today and will only clock in at 6pm. I usually don't do my laundry on Monday because I feel like I need to "stretch" the weekend vibes as much as possible since I usually will do an evening shift on Monday. But since the laundry is pilling and I have slept and eat enough, I feel like doing laundry will help me feel good. I did spend the entire weekend hanging out with my friend though. I even had an impromptu crash at my friend place on Saturday because we finished karaoke-ing at 1130pm lol.

My place here has a manual washing machine. Or is it a semi-automatic? I'm not sure the right term but it was those that have separate washing and spinning parts and you need to turn on the water and wait for it to fill and then set how long you want to wash it and then drain and repeat and et cetera et cetera.

It usually takes me forever because I hate waiting and then I'll do other things while waiting and then I forgot about it and then I remember so then I have to change the water and the let it wash again and then I'll forget about it again. I do like how you can control everything so then I can do mini washing without the guilt of using excessive water or if I just want to a quick spin.

I'm an avid user of powdered detergent. I feel like the liquid ones get stuffy if you don't hang them right away or if you don't dry them under the sun. I dry my laundry in the living room where I have this Ikea mullig and simply hangs on hangers and leave it for dayysssssssssssssssss.

Like literally for days. I hate folding so much. Also, there weren't many tenants so far in all the places I have rented so there's a lot of free space.

I used to buy that Daia powdered detergent with Downy scents. It smells so good. I don't use softener much due to that because let's be real, we only use softener for how good it smells. However, since my old landlord didn't fix the broken washing machine I just bought random detergent that I found in Speedmart as I did most of my laundry the 24hour self-service laundry. It was those that gives detergent and softener automatically for free. 

When I moves in here, I still have lots of detergents left which was not Daia so I started to buy softener again. I mean why not since I'm going through all the trouble filling in the water and draining it out and whatnot, I can give effort and add softener as well I the meantime. The smell was obviously much better and I always go overboard anyway so I keep on doing that lol.

The softener is finishing though, maybe I should buy the softener that Jungkook uses next. 

BMPIL Writing Challenge - My Favourite Desserts and Snacks!

Sep 19, 2021

I was having a rather slump-ish weekend and thought to myself that I needed to write stuff here - last night. It's now almost noon - the next day.

Also, I actually wrote something that just needed a minor tweaking but I don't like it anymore. I guess I needed to edit it some more. I also don't have a really nice vibe with my previous post, which is kinda a ridiculous reason. These have all and all made me want to just delete both of them but we'll persevere, I guess, and simply move on to our next topic.

I love this topic (insert heart emoji here)

I usually have a very specific mood for desserts and snacks. I needed to have that feel before actually eating it. I'm a slow eater and tends to savour everything and is even more so if the said food is desserts and snacks. These two were meant to be enjoyed consciously and deliberately.

Although, even after having said that, it was rare for me to really want to eat these. I don't know why though. Like if you give me something now, I won't touch it. 

Ok, let's do this, favourite dessert will go first. 

I am a chocolate enthusiast. Especially the creamier ones which means the ones with creams or dairy. So if it's a chocolate bar, it must be the milk ones. If it is a cake, then it must be the moist ones with luscious chocolate ganache. Naturally, this means I'm mad for moist brownies. There's this buffet we went to during our first year that served amazing chocolate souffle and I am hooked but I can't seem to find anywhere that sells it. If it's a drink, it must be a creamy chocolatey goodness one and hence that's why I hardly buy a chocolate drink. I usually buy iced drinks so I hated when the ice dilutes the drink and it's hard to find a good chocolate smoothie. I'll usually make hot drinks at home so milo and those Cadbury drinks are easily my favourite chocolate drinks.

I swear to all the good looking guys in anime that I've watched (tibber), dal.komm and this one local online cafe here made the best chocolate smoothies.

You can hardly go wrong with brownies as long as you stick to a recipe that includes putting chunks of chocolate into the batter but a chocolate cake from a good bakery is just on another level. I'm so into Gula Cakery now since it's close by. Apart from that, I do enjoy cheese tart as well. Be it a plain one or a fruits ones, I like them all. I'm not really a fan of egg tarts though. It's nice but I usually have this mood where I tend to not-feeling-like-having-an-egg-aftertaste.

I'm not really a snack eater.  I don't hate it though. I don't know why. I eat snacks but usually, I just don't feel like it. I might eat it if it's there or when the "want" come but I try not to buy much cause I know it will take forever to finish. Like there's this keropok ikan that I bought last Tuesday I guess because I feel like eating it and I don't have time for lunch so it was a good and rather filling snack. There's about a third of it left still laying around in the pantry.

The only cookies that I eat are either those big and chewy cookies (like the Subway's) or this cookie that my friend sells (she made it herself, it is so good and addicting). I used to like Chipsmore and always buys it but I don't anymore for like months now because I think I started to not like it. This is a weird realization to me because I've been loving Chipsmore since I'm a kid. 

I like those crispy chocolate snacks like the ones with wafer or rice crispies like Zip from Cadbury. I love that thing. I still only do chocolate flavour though. The chewy ones like Snickers is a big no no cause I hated how it stuck to my teeth.

It seems like these days, my snacks are on the sweet sides only. I don't really do savoury ones except for potato chips (any flavour is good, you can't go wrong with potato chips) and also, Super Ring. I think I only ate two types of bagged snacks - Super Ring and Pop Corn Perisa Durian. They are no bagged snacks that can compete with these two - period. 

As for ice cream, I'm usually sticking to the basics. Chocolate or vanilla. That Magnum one, the plain one, of course, is top tier. I rarely bought packed cone ice cream. I also love sour-ish popsicles which are my go-to on hot days. 

I also always have mints with me but the chewy ones instead. I do enjoy hard candy as well but I don't really have any preference. It's simply nice to pop one into your mouth. I think I can stock on hard candy in my room. That will be nice. 

BMPIL Writing Challenge - Academic Background Throwback

Aug 27, 2021

Before we go into depth I just want to rant out a few things on what today's me with "this" academic background is currently doing. 

First of all, I had my second tooth removed the other day and although I had the day off, I still had to attend two online meetings, which I think is a good distraction instead of just sleeping throughout the day. Having said that, it was hard for me to fall asleep after the meeting even tho I slept for like four hours only last night. I always have at least six hours of sleep. I still sleep though, but I woke up at 6pm feeling like this isn't the real world. 

Also, the nurse asked for my age when she was taking my blood pressure and I am so glad that I can answer quickly and confidently and that was made possible only because I  just Googled BTS members age recently and also because I asked my friends how old we are when they wish me "Happy Birthday". I don't know how I can count drug doses but become so confused when it come to counting things that are time-related.

I think I might start telling people I was born in 1993 and let them count themselves.

Photo by Karley Saagi from Pexels

This topic is actually the 19th-day topic but I have started writing this challenge like two months ago. It's okay though. I don't really have anyone to hold me accountable and these prompts were made so that I can sit comfortably, writes some random stuff and just have fun. If there's anyone who actually read this because they wanted to become a pharmacist - ermmm, hello?

Let's start, shall we?

I went to a simple tadika Kemas. Or was it tabika? 5 years old me don't care about the spelling of course. I changed my kindergarten and my primary schools thrice each as my parents keep on changing places. I think they keep applying or something because they want to settle down at Manjung. I don't really put my thought about those except it means that I don't really have that friend since I was five years old. The one friend I have known the longest is probably since I was eight or nine, from my second primary school, and we kinda get back in touch later on as we went to the same high school. 

I have no idea how we could still recognize each other. I think it was sometime during degrees that we just randomly remembered that we actually knew each other for a very long time. Since my parents were primary schools teachers, I went to the same primary school that either my mom or my dad work and thus keeps on following them when they move. It was when I was 10 years old that I finally stay at one school and finishes my primary year's education. Yes, I was that anak cikgu. 

Remember how anak cikgu always ended up being a school prefect? I don't want to be one so I settled with being a librarian instead. I think that was one of my most fun primary schools experience. 

This is turning a lot more sentimental actually so I'm going to write so long.

Fun fact - this last primary school that I went to is a sekolah wawasan plan from the government to kinda integrate the three main races in the same compound and improves our unity? I think there's like three or four of these schools throughout Malaysia. The idea was to have three schools for each main race (Malays, Indians and Chinese) in the same compound and like the kids could befriend each other. 

It doesn't work though since the schools and hence the classes are still separated and we only saw each other during recess. Plus, the Chinese school was never opened. I don't know why. It was still a kids school so it is still very lively and fun. It was the prettiest school too since it was the newest built school around the area. We also only have morning sessions instead of the usual two sessions of schooling in government schools so it was a whole lot less crowded but it was a bit far from my home. 

Actually, my dad made a point for us to go to a morning session school throughout our entire primary schooling years. Something about wanting the whole family to eat together during lunch. I think that's the other reason why they keep changing schools.  

What this also means is that I only regularly went to afternoon schools when I was ten. We don't have afternoon schools from age seven to nine because they follow the government schools nearby scheduled who practices that two sessions of schooling. I still took UPKK though.

I don't have to follow my mom anymore when  I went to high school. I just have to go to a school close to my home. I remember feeling so scared because I'm going to a new school with new people that I don't know. I was turning 13 years old so it's natural to start being so self-conscious. I was afraid that I can't penetrate into the new clique of friends since the kids will most likely be coming from the same primary school and know each other for years while there I was - that new kid. I was just being too worrisome although as I get older, I started to realize that these changing schools actually have affected me so much in my way of approaching new people.

With high school thus begin my years of riding to school and become so beautifully tanned. I think my current tanned skin was due to all those years of riding under the near noon heat. I have this one friend who lives in the same neighbourhood as mine that I ride together with to school every day. We always end up in the same class and thus sits with each other throughout all those five years and somehow also ended up doing the same clubs most of the time. 

I was a kid and I guess I never really understand the whole friendship stuff back then. It was just always having someone. I think I was too clueless at that time to really appreciate friendship too. However, we do have this ease and comfort with each other and we also have lots in common too. I've known her since I was 11 years old. Also, she was that friend who I use her name whenever I want to hang out like -  "she's going to be there too so please let me go as well". My dad was the typical unnecessarily strict Asian parent. Oh my god, I miss her so much. She works in KL now so I thought it will be fun to hang out with her more often as I've moved closer now but then Covid-19 happen.

High school went on pretty peacefully. It was simple and carefree. Studying wasn't much of a struggle, alhamdulillah for that. My classmates were the nicest people ever too. We get along so well and most of us stay in the same class for all those five years. I even ended up being the class leader one time as I was simply promoted when the current class leader got an offer to a boarding school. Thinking back about that now feels kinda weird because I always remember being indifferent in school so why did the teacher think I have leadership skills?

I'm not sure if I was actually ever qualified for a boarding school but I did purposely not giving much effort when applying. I want to stay at home. You can't simply laze around and watch tv if you're in a boarding school lol. Apart from that, we had the best teachers too and since most of us were these well-behaved kids, we didn't have much drama like cikgu merajuk sebab kelas bising or not turning out our homework. Like I said earlier, it was peaceful. Also, my favourite subject was History.

Afterwards, I went to Selangor Matriculation College. I knew I could've done better in SPM and since I wasn't a straight A's student, my chance was slim to none to get me to a foundation study. I choose matriculation and I remember wanting to redeem myself. Thus started my first experience ever living far away from home and living in dorms. Matriculation was my first shot at living independently which is kinda daunting but in a good way. Plus it is also my most honest life experience.

I remember being so good in my studies and everything that the lecturers taught just clicked. It was still all hard works and diligent discipline, especially in mathematics. It goes without saying that a person whose favourite subject being history most probably will not be doing so well in mathematics. I had a friend who taught me diligently earlier on and that tutoring of her really takes off. Her name is Afifah too. I could grasp the topic easier as the year goes by afterwards. I never get to thank her enough how that simple gesture of her really helps me a lot to build my confidence and better study habit. I daresay I might not actually become a pharmacist without her help.

The funniest thing is that it surprises me how much mathematics wasn't actually that bad. As my friend helps me with the basics that I failed to understand properly while in high school, the following topics were made easily understood as the lecturer was simply so good at explaining. The new concepts were almost welcoming and all the assignments were just these fun challenges for me. It was so surprising that I was even chosen to tutor a group of my classmates as matriculation have these programs where the better-performed classmates tutoring the other classmates. 

This might seems like obnoxious self-praise but it is honestly the best thing ever as I started to realize my actual potential. Not like to get you A's and good job but simply the attitude I've developed from it. It humbles me to know what vast knowledge really means, how to get around it so that I can provide myself with the necessary part that I needed and just understanding a lot better about myself too. Being a simple suburban kid of a primary teachers parent who meets the same person for years and hardly struggles in studies, except maybe like few months before SPM, this is a big thing for me.

With that, I got to enrol at The National University of Malaysia (UKM). But not the Bangi Campus. I was in the Kuala Lumpur Campus. It was kinda shocking when I realized that a simple girl like me is going to spend four years in the most metropolitan city in Malaysia. I never even thought of wanting to live in a big city. I simply apply for pharmacy and only upon receiving my offer letter that I come to realize that UKM's pharmacy study was on campus in KL. I remember earlier during orientation seeing how bright the sky was at night. It was glowing in orange as if a really big fire erupted. That was such a silly thought and then I started to understand what light pollution means. I thought I'd be more culture shock though. A real anti-climatic on that part.

It was a wonderful time. The KL campus was a lot smaller than the main campus, but that just means more close-knitted communities among all the different faculties. There isn't much to offer too but we're in the middle of KL so everything is just within reach. The funniest thing is how I needed to explain that our campus was smacked in the middle of Chow Kit and only a walking distance to both a monorail station and Kampung Baru. It was during those years when the cold looking Tun Razak Exchange started to be built. Also, our residential college is literally behind Tasik Titiwangsa. Tasik Titiwangsa is such a big perk but it's also a really big park. You need to walk about 1km to get you to the nearest bus station or pay for pricey taxis to get you to the nearest LRT station. We actually almost exclusively went everywhere with LRT and monorail, which then means that we have no idea how to ride those KL buses #lol.

With my newfound interest in studying, choosing pharmacy just makes so much sense. Although we do have this reputation being those who are "not qualified to become doctors so we applied for pharmacy" instead. It was a really childish thought considering how much money people be making in the pharmaceutical industry and how private doctors revenue mainly focuses on pharmaceuticals. I never have thought of pharmacy as a lesser thing of course. It's just an absurd concept for me especially since I myself purposely choose this. I remember one of the lecturer's speeches during our orientation simply questioning our choice and his readiness to give a recommendation letter if any of us want to change our mind. 

We were blessed with lots of talented lecturers and such an amazing curriculum as well. I learned to realizes this once I entered the working atmosphere. I was exposed to lots of opportunities and experiences to prepare me for the outside world. I realized how they really try to produce graduates with a good sense of consciousness and value while still being in a well-adapting character. At least I think so. I can recall direct and indirect exposures, exercises and a variety of assignments plus simply being taught by these well-rounded lecturers which leave me with a deep impression. 

Now I'm working. Working has taught me a lot more things but in an informal way of studying. It even shows more sides of me. This blog has become even more crucial for me ever since. It guides me to get a better grip of myself as writing helps me a lot to process this new "knowledge" and getting to understand it either in the sense of possible consequences or just reflecting. 

Someone told me that getting a degree but not working in that field of degree is okay. It's not a crucial thing to secure a job that reflects your degree. I never really understand that but I'm not saying it's wrong or anything. I guess it's because I always have this specific inkling not to study something that I don't really need to have a use for. Especially during this time of my life where there is no assignment to be done or exam to look forward to.

Although it is arguable that most of what I do day to day at work this time especially, as a community pharmacist, actually reflect what I learned. Heck, most of what I did wasn't even something that I was ever taught, ever. But I can say for sure that without my academic background, I can't pull this off. Also, I can't imagine being in this pandemic without my science background. It must be so confusing #lol.

I always believe that there's going to be things that will be exposed or provided to you along the academic pathway that you've chosen which will then intuitively guides you to your next future. Thus in that sense, it kinda makes more sense to me to always land on something related unless there's a big shift of things that just makes you feel that you can just forego it all and step onto a new future. Future is an undetermined timespan. You can have as many futures as you want. Also, pharmacy is a really flexible career.

My last post on Being More Present In Life Writing Challenge was almost three weeks ago. I was busy at work I guess. Plus I had a really bad toothache for about a week and had one of my wisdom teeth removed last Monday and I am scheduled to remove another one this coming Friday. Exciting times.

I also wrote about a new topic in my last post and was really excited to continue it but it might have to wait for a while. I just starting to feel like myself literally yesterday and I am due for one of the main inconveniences in my current life tomorrow so yeah, let's start simple.

I skipped this topic and wrote ahead of the two next topics because I was going to do my grocery shopping on my day off. However, I forgot that I needed to write about it and that I should've taken a photo and only remembers it when I finished unpacking everything so there's that. Not to mention I went out another two times afterwards because I keep forgetting stuff to buy. I usually made a list but I didn't make one that day and I regretted it until today. I'm not even exaggerating. 

I'm not going to do any big grocery shopping anytime soon so let me just tell you how grocery shopping usually went for me. Since I just removed a tooth and I am due for another one in a few days, I'm only doing a simple grocery shopping for now.

Since I have moved out from my old place, I started to buy my grocery in a new place. I used to do my grocery hopping at nearby a Tesco, Econsave or Segi. It depends on what I need or if I need to make a stop at Watsons, located in Tesco. I don't really mind where I buy stuff since I'm buying for one so the price isn't much of an issue for me. I usually only did a big grocery shopping when I have more items ran out so that I didn't have to go out multiple times. If it is only an odd one or two things, like for example, now I'm running out of chicken but I still have a frozen minced one, I'll just cook things that needed minced chicken instead.

Somehow, living alone for a few years now, I learned to know the basics that I need to always have in stock. It was kinda a breakthrough realization for me since earlier on, I don't feel like I need to have much groceries and just buy things when I feel like it. I don't do early breakfast before work and always have takeaways so I hardly cook. I also used to always almost exclusively only drink instant coffee. Not only that I usually home during weekends so I am only really at my rented place after work.

However, these days, I feel like those times when I was buying groceries at home where I make sure these "things" are in stock because a home needed them. I made a point to do actual grocery shopping for myself because this current home of mine needed these and also because (1) apparently it is nice to have food at home since eating takeaways can be too bleak and (2) I hate needing to go out to buy this and that so let's just buy enough to last me a long time before needing to go out again. It was mostly because I don't know what to eat and somehow cooking simple meals always works for me.

It is still a plain groceries haul though plus I learned to stock on things that will last long. I keep quite a variety of food because I always don't know what to eat so it ends up taking longer to finish. I still don't cook quite as regularly as I wanted to but if I did cook, I will only do a single meal. So things like condiments, oil and rice will take an even longer time to run out. 

Much to my joy, I found out that I like eating some simple noodle dish when I don't feel like eating anything so I always have a pack of spaghetti and those bolognese sauce in a jar at home. I like eating vermicelli as well so I always stock on that too. I recently learned about canned vegetables so I have that to cook with the spaghetti and vermicelli because those frozen vegetable ones ain't really working with me. I have a variety of frozen food though - minced meat, tempura nuggets, fries, paratha, sausages and recently I learned that those chicken popcorns really does taste like actually chicken lol. Sometimes I just cook this frozen food and called it a day.

I started to stock on other drinks too instead of just instant coffee. Sometimes I'll buy cordials but it was either Sunquick or Nutrifres. Next, it was the regular instant noodles, probably some snacks, milk, eggs, butter, syrups, ice cream, flour (almost exclusively for making pancakes) and Chilsung cider if the place happens to have one. Eggs are important though. It has been my prized solution for protein sources especially when I feel like I needed to eat more than just instant noodles for dinner or a plain cup of coffee for breakfast. Sometimes, I'll be fancy and buy fruits.

I do buy fresh food but only when I know for sure I'm going to cook it soon so that's why I hardly buy it. I don't know how long has that one piece of chicken cut has been in my fridge until I finally cooked it yesterday. 

I really did make a whole post about my groceries lol. Does this make me a good adult? Because this adult is really thankful for this adulting skill because now I feel like drinking a cup of cold milk and thank god I just bought one this morning. 

Living Late Twenties - No Commitment ?

Jul 25, 2021

I'm starting a new series called "Living Late Twenties" to address few topics about my own realities. These will mainly revolve around my current life as I'm approaching the thirties. There are a few reasons why I want to do this. Firstly, it helps me stay grounded. Secondly, it helps me become more aware of myself and what I want or need from it. Thirdly, it helps me be in touch with more heavy issues like my mental health, pharmacist career, all those hartal thingy and working for a private company. Lastly, I hope it will improve my writing and vocabulary as well. 

For today's topic - I'm writing about my current life with no commitment.

I guess my main commitment, for now, is work. For someone who is adamant to have a work-life balance, it is just cruel that I ended up having "work" as my main commitment. I'm not one to think about how you should work hard and play hard. Climb up the ladder of career and come out triumphant at the top of it. Or simply make tonnes of money to retire early. I knew there's a balance to be kept between my work life and my personal life but I also know that these two things can't really be separated as black and white. 

The two will always coincide. 

I hold on to this principle where your work is still your life but your life isn't all about your work. So for me, working is still me living my life. I can only afford this kind of mindset if I have a job that I enjoy and that excites me.

This is something I have thought deeply about long before I started my degree in pharmacy. I never really know what I wanted to be. I just made sure I did science stream just to warrant me a variety of choices when the time comes for me to finally needing to choose one. 

Choosing pharmacy was a mixed-off different reason. 

There's this expectation from my father and as for my late mother, she doesn't really ask much but I know choosing something like pharmacy will make her proud. There's this heavy "science" influence as I have been a science student for the longest time so I knew I needed to choose something of science-based. I also knew being me, I needed a career with a touch of the outside world and also allow me to engage with people so labwork isn't really appealing at all. I also want to do something that allows me to help people. I just think it will be a good life to live when your work involves helping others. 

One thing I didn't expect is how people simply expect me to choose medicine and be a doctor. We all know doctors have all those on-call shifts whatsoever plus needing to tend to gory wounds. You can't pay me enough to live such a life. 

Apart from work, there's my car, bills and monthly rent. That's it. I'm blessed to have a father that still and most probably will always be, hardly does any work, but still be making enough money to live comfortably and take care of all of my other siblings. I do make a point to splurge my siblings though. I also took this path to spend the money on my skin. I have spent thousands for god sake and restarting all over again when I got a breakout as Covid-19 strikes. This time I am adamant to eat Accutane at least until the compulsory mask-wearing rule is lifted. I have no significant other so I don't save up money for weddings or whatsoever. Although I do want to make a small ceremony only.

I just started to feel like buying myself a house which will require a more detailed plan so I decided to start saving for a year or so after I finish my laser treatments. I'm thinking to look for a new job too so it's better to settle down in a new job first before deciding the location of the said house. 

I think that's the most beautiful thing about me not having a "real" commitment. I can decide these without pressure and when I feel like it. 

I knew people who ought that a person with my financial abilities should be having a house, should spend on a local car (no offence to those who did but I just don't like those lol, the new Bezza do be looking nice though), should travel the world, should have kids before thirties, etc etc. I'm aware of these expectations but I just never feel like I was the person who is expected to do so. Heck, hartal or not, I'm just looking at it as a way to be flexible and change when I feel like I needed to.

The hardest question is - am I being irresponsible for choosing this way of living? Somehow, social construct made me feel like this is the main issue - that I am somehow being irresponsible. If so, to whom do I owe these responsibilities anyway? Because responsible or not, I am happy and content.

I know for a fact that my father wants me to settle down as soon as possible and I guess at this point he knew he can't say anything that will change my mindset. That's about it.  

However, there is one thing I know for sure. I owe myself more self-development than my current work. I feel like I need a side thing to do to complete this pharmacist side of mine. I know I needed another commitment and preferably something on the creative side or something that solely depends on me to build on from scratch. 

There are few ideas that I took a liking to. Probably a more professional blogger, freelance content creator, actually put an effort and publish a poetry book, some simple business on Shopee or learn one or two new languages. Something to get my brain active you know. It's hard though. In between this current eight-hour job and just how depressing Covid-19 is being plus THE FREAKING HEAT, it's easier to just not do anything. I don't really have much commitment anyway.

I had to Google if it was supposed to be "on the last day" or "in the last day" for the title and I never thought that one of the things I would notice when I'm doing this challenge was how bad my English is and how limited my vocabulary as well.

So, on the last day before PKP start, I'm not sure what PKP was it but it was when we can still rentas daerah and dine in, I made a point to go out. We went for a staycation two weeks before, so this time it was a simple meet-up and just hang out. Since it was very last minute, we just decided to go to Setia City Mall to walk around and have a bite. Setia City Mall has just opened Lulu Hypermarket so I went around to have a see but since I don't feel like bringing groceries home, I didn't buy anything. I remember seeing this one pan that was just the right size and the right depth and thought to myself to come again to buy it. Then this actual lockdown happens.

There is also a newly opened Sukiya Tokyo Bowl & Noodle. I only come to realize that Sukiya wasn't only about their hot pot so seeing that SCM has that, I just have to try. It was nice but I don't think I'm going again though. We also make a point to go to Chizu and experience the aesthetic. I forgot which branch was it that have this beautiful interior but the one in SCM was on par. The croissant wasn't really that memorable but all those toppings make it up. I do feel like the price range is a bit too much and that those mini croissants in Petronas were better. The drink was amazing though. I'm always skeptical with these cheese drinks but the cheese foam really went well with the drinks. All and all, it was a really nice day out.

This was only last April but somehow feels like a lifetime ago. Not like the previous PKP, this time, everything just feels surreal. Time simply feels like a standstill. I am so glad that I can still go to work but since I made a point not to do my work at home, time just stop" once I got back to my place. It somehow feels like the surrealness of it simply triggered once I step into my place after work and only properly resume once I start my car and go to work. I swear to god the most productive thing that I have done is finishing Vincenzo and this one donghua series. I just need to go home and reset. I should probably do things like exercising or hone a new skill and whatnot but with all due respect, just fuck it.

Writing helps. I need to cut out my phone time. It starts to get hot again.

BMPIL Writing Challenge - My Current Three Most Played Playlist

Jul 17, 2021

It has been a few days that I stopped writing because I just feel like it. There's actually a draft that I meant to publish before writing this but it hasn't finished yet and I don't feel like continuing it now. For now, I want to write this topic because it's easy, fun and it's about things that I enjoy.

My go-to music player is Spotify. I used Youtube too but only at work though. I used to have my own playlist on Spotify that I will update every few months and then I will just keep playing that one playlist. I guess I'm becoming old already that current mainstream songs hardly interest me so I stopped updating that playlist and haven't played it for the longest time. If I feel like getting entertained and wanted to sing, I'll play either This is Maroon 5 or This is Adele on Spotify. Sometimes, I'll play either Bad Blood or Wild World album by Bastille. I knew most of the lyrics so it's easy to get in the mood and enjoy them. 

Image by tomasi from Pixabay

Since those starting to get boring too, I started to hear to other playlists so that I can find any playlist that I will enjoy. The problem is, I don't know how to find any that I will like so I just searched random keywords but found nothing at all. Not until one day I actually found one that I just adore so much. It's called Tsukishima Kei by Novaasoph. I randomly scrolled to this character fanart on Instagram and by sheer coincidence, I actually read the caption saying to scan the Spotify code on the character's t-shirt. I never tried to scan a Spotify code so I thought "hey this is interesting, let's try it". The first song that played piqued my interest and I just click "Follow". 

I always have a playlist to play at work too. Since we cast Youtube to the shop's television, I started to find any playlist on Youtube that I enjoy. There are two playlists that I have abused so much till it bores me so I stopped playing it much nowadays but much to my joy, I found a new one! It was from actually songs from Hyuk Oh. The chill vibes but rather different than the usual melody just feel fresh for me. I always love Hyuk Oh so it was natural for me to switch to him once those two earlier playlists start to bores me.

I do have one playlist that I did myself which comprises of songs that I actually like but it wasn't really mainstream songs or anything? It was a collection of really chill songs that were kinda supposed to be a really cool white noise while driving but also isn't really a white noise? It wasn't even in English or Malay too which added that white noise value. It was initially meant to be my new go-to playlist but at that moment, I was enjoying these few chill-like songs and then I decided to just leave it at that. There are only eight songs that lasted for about half an hour which suited nicely for me driving back after a long day at work. All of the songs were made knows to me so randomly too. I really love this playlist since most of the songs have that one clean part that I like to just focus on it. It might be a cool beat drop, a soothing instrument, a focus on the singer's vocal, or just a mix of those. Since my car has a nice speaker and the bass is just so fine, it added more value into letting myself be absorbed into the song and let loose. Why am I exaggerating on this playlist lol. I've moved into a closer place though so I haven't played it in the car for the longest time. Songs just hit different when you're driving.

BMPIL Writing Challenge - My Current Skincare Products

Jul 11, 2021

Today's a Sunday and I don't feel like sleeping after Subuh. However, I don't really feel like doing anything as well. I feel like eating pancakes though. I made a batch of pancakes the other day and just keeps it in the refrigerator so I can simply reheat it whenever I feel like eating pancakes. Sometimes you just want pancakes you know.

Afterward, I feel sleepy again. It was almost 8am something so I thought I've been awake enough this early in the morning and went back to sleep. Woke up again at 11ish and just don't feel like I need to do anything so like pejam celik pejam celik and decides to properly wake up when it's 11.30am. I don't like waking up late. It makes me feel bad and even groggier but there are days when I did this and feel refresh. I guess it's a good reset to sleep on that long. I still don't know what to do and then I remembered my leftover tom yam yesterday and some dishes I left because I was too lazy yesterday so I did those. Since I'm still not sure what to do, I just cooked some rice since it's almost noon anyway and finally decided to write this.

I made an actual effort last night to took some decent pictures of my skincare products. Setup a mini all-white background and use my table lamp for extra lighting. But the table lamp is running out of battery and I'm too lazy to recharge it so I didn't go into trying different angles. Should've tried the HDR mode.

I'm not the most diligent in putting on skincare but I do made a point to at least stick to basics for my skincare which means the main four step - cleanser, toner, moisturiser and sunscreen. However, since I have an acne prone skin, I do have acne spot treatment on hand as well which I only wears when I have acne or those tiny bumps. Apart from that, I also have some products for hyperpigmentation.

My main concern in my skincare is hydration and also not having any oily finishes. The trend today is more on getting those glowy looks from applying skincare products but I feels like it looks too oily me. I wanted my skincare too look like it hydrates my skin and just looks plump? So now, I somehow keeps at least two types of gel or water based moisturizer and mix them. I don't know why I did those but I did it lol. At night however, I'll mix one either gel or water based moisturizer with a heavier consistency and slightly oily moisturizer. I think I feel like cleansing my face just bares it naked and I need to take that opportunity to lock in moisturizer and since I'm not going anywhere at night, applying a heavier afterwards will in turn lock in the moisturizer. I swear I didn't make this up. There a science somewhere in there that I have learned which makes me wears it like this. Also I just love wearing moisturizer.

I have four moisturizer at the moment. I finishes my Hada Labo Moisturising Water Gel and thought to save some money and buys the good ol' Aiken Tea Tree Oil Moisturizer. It has been a while since I wore Aiken. I decided to wear Aiken because I wanted to incorporate more oil into my skin and also because I started to use their Aiken's Tea Tree Oil as spots treatment. I have benzoyl peroxide for spot treatments before this but it just don't work like at all and the bottle that I have was opened for month already so instead of buying a new benzoyl peroxide cream, I switches back to tea tree oil. The oil works like a charm since I only have like one or two papule or small pustules nowadays and it wasn't much often too. If I was having worse than that, benzoyl peroxide will work better. Though I have to tell that I don't remember Aiken's moisturiser to have such strong fragrant. Thank god it didn't cause any breakout but the smell is almost dizzying. I'm going to try Thursday Plantation once this finishes.

Since I wanted to wear two type of moisturizer, I randomly bought that Safi Perfect White Illuminating Day Cream to replace the old Safi moisturizer that I have finishes. I can't seem to remember what was it exactly but I think it was a night cream . I was curious to see the texture of this day cream and it turns out so nice. It was absorbed right away and hardly have any smells. I'm really loving the varieties in Safi products although I'm not a big fan on the gel one which was meant for acne. It was a bit oily for me. I also have Wardah Witch Hazel Purifying Moisturizing Gel. Although I only buys this at random since it was on sale and because it was a gel moisturizer. The gel texture was amazing and it got absorbed right away almost like Hada Labo Moisturising Water Gel. But I'm keeping this away for now and planning to use it daily once the Safi one's finishes. As for my heavier consistency moisturizer, I'm currently using The Ordinary Moisturising Factor + HA (not included in the picture). I think there's a quarter left and I just don't feel like buying it online again so I'm going to just use my Vaseline once this finishes.

I forgot to took photos of my cleanser and toner though. I'm using a salicylic acid cleanser from Hannan Medispa and Neutrigena Deep Clean Foeming Cleanser. I alternate between the two and usually only cleanse my face once a day since the Accutane really dries up my skin. I need to buy a new gentle cleanser but I just don't really feel like it. Right after washing my face, I spray on Hatomugi Skin Conditioner Lotion which acts as my toner. Deciding to put those lotion into a spray bottle was one of my greatest life decisions. I just sprays it and wait for it to dry which actually helps in a simple hydration of my skin before applying my moisturizer. It was a good face mist too. Unlike the regular water based mist, it really get absorbed way better and hydrates so well too. 

I have three products for hyperpigmentation which is - this brightening cream for Dr Ko, Wardah's C-Defense Vitamin C Serum and Safi Balqis OxyWhite Whitening Essence. I don't know what was in that brightening cream from Dr Ko but I always forgot to wear it anyway. It got so many rules so I simply got too lazy to wears it. I also decided to wear vitamin C serums for my skin hyperpigmentation and that's why I mistakenly bought that Safi one's. I read it as 1000 times concentration which at the time does feels like a lie seeing it was too cheap for such claim and much later on realizes it was 1000 times better instead. I can't even remember when I bought it. I just needed a new vitamin c serum as the Wardah's one is finishing and I am too lazy to go out again. The Wardah's one have this sticky finish but dries up eventually but it kinda adds up to the moisturizer so I don't really mind. The Safi ones was like a slightly thicker waterbased gel so I'm loving it as well. I don't know if these actually lighten my hyperpigmentation but I guess it will benefits me in the long run to stick to a routine. 

Regardless of the many moisturizer and hyperpigmentation products that I owned, I only have one sunscreen which is this Sunplay Skin Aqua UV Whitening Moisture Gel. Also, I meant to buy the Biore sunscreen but I only realizes it now that it was not  a Biore. But the consistency and UV protection characteristics are the same and that is the only thing that matter. No one want to have oily and white cast finishes if they ever want to stick on wearing a sunscreen.

That was all. I only remembers to apply my skincare when I'm going to work and at night. I simply forgets to wear these on my days off unless if I'm going out. But the routine really makes my skin feel better and looks healthier so I really need to work on this.

You know how those kedai siam have these lime juice in bottles which they use in cooking? I found one the other day while grocery shopping and it only cost RM3 so I bought one. I hardly cook anything that will require lime juice but I bought it because I thought it can give me some more varieties in my cooking plus it probably will make a good lime drink. I like a chilled lime drink. Again, it only cost RM3, and what a blessing that my iced lime drink turns out amazing. 

I've been skipping few days from writing this "Being More Present in Life Writing Challenge" just because I don't feel like thinking too much after coming home at 8pm. I simply made myself comfortable and watch Netflix. I'm currently in the mood for simple action or adventure movies but kinda runs out of options on Netflix so we're writing today.

I'm not the most environmentally conscious person. Yet still, I daresay that I'm doing better than most people I know. You really can't expect much from Malaysians anyway. I can confidently say that there is only one person that I know personally who is such a good environmentally conscious person and practices just as much. Like this girl be bringing Tupperware to tapau her food and I think she once shares this shop where you can buy you groceries by putting it into your own container. I don't even think such a shop existed in Malaysia.

I tried though. Like for example when I did my groceries, I will bring my own bag. I knew I always forgot so I have three of those and put them all in my car so that I will always have one extra if I left any at home. I try not to buy things online and if I have to, I'll try to buy them from a local seller so that I can reduce my carbon footprint. Since I'm also lazy, if I need to drive my car out, I will try to do my work on one trip. I'll collect all my plastic bottles and put them separately so that the garbage man can simply separate them. These days, I'll bring the plastic bottles to work as there is this lorry who did rounds around the shop lot and collects those. 

It is quite troublesome for me to be using tumbler so I still use plastic cups but I rarely bought one pon. I still put vegetables and fruits in those plastics where they will tape it and then stick the barcode sticker. But since the plastic bag is just so big, I'll put few items in one plastic and had them put all the stickers on that one plastic bag. There is this one time where the makcik who worked at the weighing station praises me saying it's better that I put them all together than wasting all those plastic bags.

I think one of the main things that kinda drives me to be more environmentally conscious is this kind of "not wanting to waste" thinking. I think many people can relate to me how it feels to not want to waste things. However, in my mindset, all these plastics will simply be left there not being able to decompose and just accommodate space but if I use less of them or disposes of them the right, I'm wasting less. 

Most that come from middle-income families like me will probably always have this "not wanting waste" mindset yet somehow, we are always so lenient when it comes to food. Thus the use of plastic still keeps on rising. It simply surprises me when one of my friends who's older by two years from me got confused when I ask them about global warming and how my other friend doesn't feel anything throwing plastic bottles after plastics bottles as her only source of safe drinking water was the bottled ones.

I am more laidback in terms of being good to the environment really. Yes, those big companies still at large and are the main issues here but we're living together on this one and only Earth, it's just plain stupid and selfish not being kind to it.

You know what, I think I will get myself a good tumbler and put it in my car so that I can use it when I suddenly buy coffee. Also, a good food container complete with compartments will be easier to fill when buying my lunch and a lot easier to eat from too. Heck, we're currently all wearing a mask pon if I ever feel self-conscious about it!

For this challenge, I am going to compare this morning with the morning of my first day writing this challenge. Also, I'm supposed to be writing about my current skincare but everything is a mess. I have yet developed a good system to arrange my skincare products in this new house so let's make this as simple as it can be and then went into arranging my skincare products.

First of all, I woke up late today. I think it was almost 9am? I wake up around 8am on my first day. However, I wasn't as groggy today and was in a better mood as well. The grogginess effect that I was having before has gone by now and I've been getting better sleep. I'm not entirely sure if my improving sleep was due to my magnesium supplement or because this place wasn't as hot as my previous place. Although, it is also worth noting that I am feeling more comfortable living in this house and that I was drinking more water. The landlord provides a Cuckoo water dispenser and of course, I feel like drinking more if I got easy access to chilled water. I've been getting a mild headache, not so bad, kinda just a buzz, but still very annoying headache, quite often before as I don't get good sleep and be drinking enough water. So I didn't feel that way now. 

I was hungry waking up and I just want rice. I think it was my PMS. I always get so hungry during my PMS and usually, I only want rice, but apart from that, I hardly feel hungry upon waking up. However, I was so adamant to have a slow morning so going out won't fit into the schedule. Not to mention that I'm new here so I'm not sure where exactly can I get a good breakfast. Previously I went for nasi dagang nearby which I already know is good. Thank god that I realize I was PMS-ing last night that I cooked extra rice to be made into fried rice for my breakfast today.

I made a simple fried rice and some milo. It has been two days now that I drink milo in the morning instead of coffee. I still made a coffee at work but I just want to see if I will feel any difference cutting out caffeine in the morning as the caffeine didn't really kick in the morning than it is when I'm at work. I ate my breakfast while watching the Collateral. I watched some the previous night and wanted to finish it. I watch most of Tom Cruise's movies except those during his younger years but I never watch Collateral. I liked Tom Cruise's acting for the boyish and cheeky way he acts but in Collateral, he has this more adult and serious business vibes so I just don't feel like it. Not to mention the gray hair. But it turns out good. His acting doesn't leave much impact on me per usual but the plot still carries and the movie turns out to be better than I have expected.

After that, I scrolled through my phone for a while and chill. Then I tidy up a little around the kitchen and wash the dishes. Not like during the first day where I was feeling so lazy and wore a t-shirt to work, I ironed a blouse today. After that, I took a shower and get ready to work. Since I'm having a housemate now, I don't want to worry her by not closing the gate so I make a point to not running out too late so to prevent myself from making excuses not to close the gate when I'm off to work. 

I found a flaw in this house. The thing is, this house has a smaller gate so I have to open both doors to get my car in. Apart from that, the gates always move! So now I need to open both doors to either side to open them, put some bricks to prevent them from moving, get my car in/out and then push away the brick to close the gate back. It was a legit ritual. I'm so getting an automated porch gate if I ever buy a house.

All and all, I appreciate how much better I'm feeling. My work is just the same but I guess the hassle of needing to move out and in turn feeling out of place there kinda takes a toll on me. I was feeling so much better that I don't mind if my old landlord suddenly came up with reasons not to return my deposit. She did return it but it kinda surprises me when the thoughts came and I don't really feel bothered. My new housemate was nice. She was older than me so I guess it feels good to not being the adult in the house. 

That's it. I feel like drinking some chilled water.

BMPIL Writing Challenge - My Friend's Instagram Stories

Jul 4, 2021

It is so easy to postpone one simple task and then one simple task become five so now I'm writing instead. Also, I was so stressed with my hair fall and tries this bang's filter to see if I will look good with one since I might need one to hide my almost receding hairline. I need to buy some good essential oil or something.

On the other hand, I finish two series on Netflix today! It was somewhat a relief because I actually finish not one, but two, and without randomly start on a new one. Although I did start a new one last two weeks but that's beside the point. 

For today's "Being More Present in Life Writing Challenge" - we are writing a simple recap/review on ten Instagram stories that are on my Instagram.  I decide to write those that were published by my actual friends. The goal here is to see what kind of "things" I was fed on Instagram although as usual, people only scroll Explore page most of the time.


The first one is my friend from the hospital I used to work. She works in a klinik kesihatan  now. She did two stories that were a throwback from a trip she went on in 2018. I think she went with her friends from university so it's an all-girls trip. It looks so fun with singing in the car and just loud laughing.


The second one was from my sister. She always almost exclusively only post TikTok videos that are usually about anime or things she found funny and write some comment on it. She watches more anime than me now and reads manga too so her anime always varies. I love to check her stories because she is my sister and also the funny ones are really funny. Sometimes she sends us the videos too lol. For today she reposts this TikTok video complaining she didn't like the remix. It was odd because I've heard that remix so many times for so long now.


The third one is from my university friend. She usually posted stuff about work or about her son. Her son is so cute. She was among the few of us that already in a relationship while studying and I think she got married when she finishes her PRP training. She was also among the few people I respect and adore due to how dependable and sweet she is while doing my degree. She posted a story about her son telling about his food journey. Always love seeing how my peers were raising their child especially since I do know their personality.

#4 and #5

Coincidentally, the fourth and fifth stories were from these seniors from my old hospital. One of them was newly transferred from Sabah so I only knew her for a couple of months before I move out while the other one was my dearest senior that was there from my first day there. They were doing a shift at Pusat Pemberian Vaksin together and were showing their darkened and dry hands due to the frequent use of hand sanitizer. I didn't know hand sanitizer can do that but I guess it was because of how drying it is. The hand sanitizer in the hospital was legit y'all. The alcohol smells just stings your nostrils.


This one is also from a friend from my old hospital. She is then a colleagues with the kakak from #4 and #5 but I think she's two years younger than me. She is also a mom and frequently shares stories about her son. Today, she shares a quote that I found so amusing that said "Young people think they know it all. Old people think they know it all. There's a sweet spot right in the middle where we know that nobody really knows shit". It was from a parenting account. She is also a writer but I'm not sure if she has a blog. She did however uses those content creator apps and accept writing commissions.


The seventh one is from a friend of mine from high school that works as a doctor. She shares a short clip of what I believe and CT scan or a MRI scan. That was my first time seeing such a scan in video form. It was usually in the form of pictures. I got intrigued and ask her for more details about it lol. It shows increased pressure within her patient skull that leads to intracranial bleeding that in turn causes a stroke. The patient defaulted their medicine. This is the actual result when we told people to eat their blood pressure medicine or else they can get a stroke. Those little headaches that the patient only dismissed with Panadol were only there when the blood pressure was too high already.


This story is from my university friend who is currently working in Sabah. She was promoting nasi dagang from a place in Kajang which probably her family member business or something. She is indeed a Terengganu breed. Oh my god, that nasi dagang looks so good,


This story is about my friend's son. The first one was funny. It shows how her husband, putting their son's milk on a controlled toy car and had it delivered to him. The other showing her son being all cute and want to help to make mommy's coffee. She is also a friend from my university that was in a relationship while doing our degree and got married sometime after PRP too. I made a point to highlight this because they weren't many of us who got into an actual relationship while studying and we only have one couple from our batch that got married yet we have no idea at all that they were in any kind of relationship.


Oh we're coming to an end! The last story was also about my friend's son. This friend was my housemate for a year. She works at klinik kesihatan nearby but did a two-month attachment in our hospital and together with another friend of us, we decided to move in together. It was the best decision ever. It feels good to live with someone who understands what were you doing day in day out and were single. She got married at the end of our one year of living together and then moves out to stay with her husband. The story was about her son playing in an inflatable pool. Honestly, an inflatable pool is a must for kids.


That is it. I usually got bored with the stories. I scrolled through a few and then I'm done. Since it is arranged according to the newest published, I always missed those stories that I actually needed to see, such as the stories from my favorite coffee place here.

BMPIL Writing Challenge - Outfits To Work

Jul 3, 2021

My friend and I were told that there is an online meeting next week. I thought it was for all of us but apparently, our two other friends do not receive the invite. To make it more suspicious, we were both scheduled at different time which probably means it's going to be one on one meeting. There are a lot of things that I might or might not have done which can be mentioned in the meeting and honestly, I'm just overthinking this too much but damn I am so anxious.

Here are the outfits and my dirty mirror.

t/w - I'm not one to have the fanciest ootd

Outfit one

There is actually a non-blurry version of this picture but this one is the only one that doesn't make me look like a pregnant woman and the less awkward. One would think my constant selfie with this mirror would make me pose better but it hasn't. Not for all these years. I don't wear this blouse quite often because I was too lazy to iron it as it is longer than my other blouse. I know that is not a legit reason but it is what it is. I only wore this as I actually send this with a bunch of other blouses to a laundry shop near my workplace to be ironed. Also, it is too hot for me to iron anything.

Outfit #2


This is my first time wearing this t-shirt to work. I rarely wore a t-shirt to work and the only time I did was when I was at my low and just don't feel like it. This was one of them. I was tired of moving out and still going to work. Plus, I just hate ironing. Anyway, I was positive that I can pull it off looking a bit more formal with that wide-leg pants but as you can see, it did not. I feel really off the whole day and swore not to wear that t-shirt to work again.

Outfit #3

This was taken at my new place. The existence of this mirror in this new place plus no mess at the back marked that I have succeeded in moving all my stuff from my old place and unpacking most of it. I was actually running late as I tried to tidy up some stuff and lost track of the time. I was so glad to found this knitted sweater in the cupboard or else I will be so late needing to iron my blouse. I guess all those rushing and tidying is why my face made such an expression.

I am reveling in the fact that I don't have the compulsory baju kurung rules anymore. I made a point not to wear baju kurung for at least three months when I started working here. Also here's a picture of me being in love with my white blazer because I was annoyed with the flappy tail of the usual long white coat. I like how it gives me a stronger structure and less hospital-ish vibes.


 I think there is only one take from this topic - I need to clean my mirror.